If Ignorance IS Bliss

Than these are some very happy people...

I pulled into a parking spot at the Albertson's the other day and glanced at the truck next to me to make sure I'd given it enough room: It was the kind of rig I refer to as a PET - a Penis Envy Truck - You know the type... Where, purely from appearance, you just assume that the owner thereof is a mean spirited, shitty driving, tobacco chewing, Miller Lite drinking asshole with a teeny, tiny little cock, and he's trying to make up for it with his rig... You know, those trucks: Huge tires, ridiculously jacked up suspension, big chrome brush guard, light rack, bumper steps, gun rack, and after-market logo brake light covers?

What caught my eye, though, was an accoutremént; one of those cute little ‘Piss On’ stickers. Once again, you know these – You see them a lot on PETs. They have a little Calvin-like character, (A la Calvin and Hobbes, neither of whom would approve of such use, I’m sure), pissing on something – When they’re on a Ford, he’s pissing on a Chevy symbol, or a Dodge, etc, etc. These are the same dipshits who have license frames that read, ‘Built To Smoke The Powerstroke,’ ‘Get in, sit down, shut up, and hang on,’ or ‘Cash, Grass, or Ass – Nobody rides for free!’ Get the picture? Ok... Still think I meant it when I called those stickers cute? Ok, good…

Well this particular sticker had the little Calvin fella pissing on the words WAR PROTESTERS. OK, now… Maybe it was real hot and I was pissy, or maybe I’m overly sensitive… or maybe it just really pissed me off. I leaned against the trunk of my car, waiting, because I just had to see what the owner of this piece of shit looked like… I watched the people coming out, picked a couple of likely looking redneck males, but… Nope. Finally, here came a rail thin bleached blonde with a 38D chest bursting out of her husband beater T-Shirt and three ragged kids in tow. As she started loading kids and groceries, I noted a tattoo on the back of her neck; the number 24 inside a heart with a lightning bolt through it, and Jeff printed underneath. I’m not even close to a NASCAR fan, but I assume it to be an homáge to Jeff Gordon.

I said, “How y’all doin’?” and she just nodded warily, (Which is highly unusual for Texans, frankly.) Now, I am a fine actor, and I was puttin’ on my best full-bore friendly Texas good ol’ boy redneck vibe, and I look and can play the part. I said “Man, I jus’ love that li’l guy, where’d y’all get that sticker?” She pushed the last kid into the truck, wheeled toward me and said, without missing a beat, “You got a problem with it? Go fuck yerself!” She jumped in the driver’s seat, fired up the diesel, and blasted on out of there.

I stood there watching, kind of blown away, actually. She flipped me off as she hit the end of the parking lot, cab full of kids and all…

I had a very contemplative shopping trip, thinking about this little exchange. I’d noticed that Calvin was the only sticker on her ride; no troop support ribbons, no God Bless America, nothing, (And that’s unusual in Texas too...) What had caused her to be so angry and defensive? Had that many people flipped her shit about it? It’s possible, actually, (If you don’t live here, you don’t know, but Texas is much more open minded than you think.) Had she lost somebody over there? A husband, a brother, sister, or father? That could make anybody and maybe elicit such a response... Or last but not least, was she just a hateful redneck asshole? After all, there’re plenty of those, too…

In any case, I wasn’t too likely to give her the benefit of the doubt. Anybody who would act like that in front of their kids doesn’t strike me well. Anybody who would put that sticker up and defend it doesn’t strike me well, either…

The right to protest, to disagree publicly without fear of reprisal is a seminal principle in this country. Had we lost the Revolutionary War, our Founding Fathers would have been hung for treason. Hell, the dang Declaration of Independence is a protest. I heard a woman on the Diane Rheem show this morning praising Hezbolah and condemning Bush as a war criminal for supporting the killing of her countrymen in the Gaza Strip; she lives in Chicago. In a lot of places in the world today, you're more likely than not to be arrested, tortured, or killed for expressing such sentiments, or even for being assumed to be a certain race, faith etc.: She can do that here, because this country is based on such rights...

How could anyone who considers themselves a proud American deny another the right to protest the senseless loss of life war represents? Obviously, that’s what pissed me off. I’ve served in uniform; I’ll concede that rarely, war is necessary, but not this one – I absolutely protest this war and everything associated with it. I pray for the protection and wellbeing of soldiers every day. I mourn the loss of 2500+ American lives and many, many more Iraqi and Afghani civilians, every day. I support the people willing to put their lives on the line for their country, but I do not support this war. I support the right of Israeli, Palestinian, and Lebanese people to live in peace, but I don’t support that war either. To be honest, the only war in recent history that I believe was worthy of being fought was World War II, (And I’ve read a lot of war history…).

I understand grief, anger, and frustration. I understand that some people think war is good, right, and necessary; I just don’t agree with them. I respect their right to their beliefs, but I don’t agree with those beliefs. I understand that some people actually hate those who are different than they are, because of their beliefs, race, skin color, or sexual preference; any one of a myriad of things – I just don’t agree with that kind of hatred, and I never will. I understand that this sort of sentiment exists, but I just don’t support it. I can grasp their hatred and even some of the reasoning behind it, but I don’t believe in it, and I don’t think it should be supported or promoted. I just don’t tolerate such things well, because I don’t like it, plain out and simple. There are, of course, generally accepted terms for this sort of thing: Bigotry, racism, hate-speech, and narrow-minded stupidity come to mind... I understand it, but I don’t respect it or condone it, and I don’t care whether or not it’s acceptable to say that.

I guess I believe that if you put a sticker on yer rig that expresses, ‘Piss on War Protesters,’ you’ve just put it out there as a Big Fuck You to see if anybody will challenge you. Realizing that, I think I understand why that woman was defensive. It’s the same reason that racists and bigots and Neo Nazi’s are defensive: They understand, fundamentally, that they are indeed flying a Big Fuck You at society in general, and they simply don’t care. Rather than feel anybody out, it’s easier to assume that everybody’s gonna be pissed off at you and act accordingly. The fact is, most people are decent, peace loving creatures, and as such, sentiments like that are going to be generally perceived as offensive and vulgar; hence the expected reaction is negative…

And yet, they still put them up there on their PETs…

You know what? This brings to mind one of my favorite bumper stickers of all time: I’ve not seen one in a while, but maybe it’s time to hunt one down.

It reads, simply, MEAN PEOPLE SUCK.